The miles away club

Chaos reigned at Heathrow airport early this morning as new rules concerning flying age of consent came into being. International airlines had agreed to new legislation (The knee-jerk bill) to raise the age of people flying without guardians to fifty in a sweeping attempt to prevent young repressed people from becoming victims of the sex tourism industry.
Clearly government had not thought through the implications of these new laws fully as aircrew had not been explicitly excluded from the law. Health and safety executives effectively shut down the airport as pilots attempted to get their elderly mothers or fathers with wheelchairs and zimmer frames into the cockpit. Some planes had to resort to the pilots having to sit on their mum's knee whilst attempting to taxi and take off. 

Disclaimer: This story is satire - this means it is for entertainment only and is not true. Mr Anthrop accepts no responsibility for the accuracy or otherwise of this information - it is all untrue. If you see any allegory or similarity with actual events, people or places, you are plainly mistaken.